Is there a secret???

So today I'm having breakfast this morning at my local cafe reading a book called How to Talk to Anyone...then this totally random though pops into my head..."What is the secret to a true long term relationship??"  I though I knew many things about relationships but coming out the end of this most recent relationship I realise I know very little about how to make a relationship last beyond that first few months of total infatuation and engagement with each other. 

After the initial few weeks/months...how do you keep that spark alive?  One train of thought is well...have an open relationship.  I can't express how much this goes against my values but at the same time the thought did cross my mind in this most recent experience.

I think though communication overrides absolutely everything and well...I think I failed miserably at that...although not for want of trying.  But communication and people are my downfall at times if not always.  This is something that I'm working on regularly.


But it still doesn't answer my question about is there a secret?  I see many people in love and happy in there relationship after one year, five years, ten year and even sixty or seventy years!!  It makes me wander is there a secret or is it the chemistry, meeting the exact right person or...who knows.

I'm not expecting an answer but I just want to put it out there to the universe!!

how inappropriate - that's not Top News Facebook!!

Sometimes Facebook is so inappropriate...so I broke up with my ex about 2 months ago.  We stopped sharing an apartment and moved out three weeks ago this Friday and finally handed the lease over two weeks ago tomorrow.  Facebook doesn't realise this even though you tell it that you're no longer in a relationship with the person but they're still you're friend.  So right that at the top of Top News posts tonight was...having dinner at XXXX's with a special someone!!

I was like, what the!!! This isn't top news so I politely tell Facebook please hide this post to which is does only to then have the post reappear next time I log in.  So short of de-friending (if there is such a word) my ex I'm left with no option but to not have their posts appear in my news feed.

So tonight I'm a little upset that he would move on quickly even through I suspected it would happen.  I don't want to be angry at him and I don't want to be upset. But perhaps I need to go through this pain so I can move on.  Stuffed if I know.

Perhaps there's someone out there in blog land who might stumble across my blog and offer some helpful advice.  *sigh*

So where to from here.  I continue on with my life...continue on growing, becoming stronger, happier and healthier...continue becoming more confident, personable and friendly to myself and to those around me.  Finally being more gracious, thankful and compassionate in all that I do.

So thank you for this day.  Thank you for the lovely sunshine, the food I have to eat, and a roof over my head.  Thank for laughter, joy and happiness.  Thank you for new friendships, passing interests and new adventures.

Time for sleep now.  Tomorrow is a new day and a new beginning!