Is there a secret???

So today I'm having breakfast this morning at my local cafe reading a book called How to Talk to Anyone...then this totally random though pops into my head..."What is the secret to a true long term relationship??"  I though I knew many things about relationships but coming out the end of this most recent relationship I realise I know very little about how to make a relationship last beyond that first few months of total infatuation and engagement with each other. 

After the initial few weeks/months...how do you keep that spark alive?  One train of thought is well...have an open relationship.  I can't express how much this goes against my values but at the same time the thought did cross my mind in this most recent experience.

I think though communication overrides absolutely everything and well...I think I failed miserably at that...although not for want of trying.  But communication and people are my downfall at times if not always.  This is something that I'm working on regularly.


But it still doesn't answer my question about is there a secret?  I see many people in love and happy in there relationship after one year, five years, ten year and even sixty or seventy years!!  It makes me wander is there a secret or is it the chemistry, meeting the exact right person or...who knows.

I'm not expecting an answer but I just want to put it out there to the universe!!

how inappropriate - that's not Top News Facebook!!

Sometimes Facebook is so inappropriate...so I broke up with my ex about 2 months ago.  We stopped sharing an apartment and moved out three weeks ago this Friday and finally handed the lease over two weeks ago tomorrow.  Facebook doesn't realise this even though you tell it that you're no longer in a relationship with the person but they're still you're friend.  So right that at the top of Top News posts tonight was...having dinner at XXXX's with a special someone!!

I was like, what the!!! This isn't top news so I politely tell Facebook please hide this post to which is does only to then have the post reappear next time I log in.  So short of de-friending (if there is such a word) my ex I'm left with no option but to not have their posts appear in my news feed.

So tonight I'm a little upset that he would move on quickly even through I suspected it would happen.  I don't want to be angry at him and I don't want to be upset. But perhaps I need to go through this pain so I can move on.  Stuffed if I know.

Perhaps there's someone out there in blog land who might stumble across my blog and offer some helpful advice.  *sigh*

So where to from here.  I continue on with my life...continue on growing, becoming stronger, happier and healthier...continue becoming more confident, personable and friendly to myself and to those around me.  Finally being more gracious, thankful and compassionate in all that I do.

So thank you for this day.  Thank you for the lovely sunshine, the food I have to eat, and a roof over my head.  Thank for laughter, joy and happiness.  Thank you for new friendships, passing interests and new adventures.

Time for sleep now.  Tomorrow is a new day and a new beginning!

feeling exhausted

WOW!! I feel like i've done a million things this weekend...even though in fact i've done really little.  I was quite disappointed yesterday when i hopped on the scales and they popped back a horrid figure of 95kgs!!!!! I was like what the!!! I've been working so hard and trying to eat right and that... my clothes are starting to feel looser but yet i'm still 95kg!!! I'm shocked, disappointed and somewhat lost for words.

But...you know on reflection I need to move forward...so I've started cooking healthy meals this weekend...to store for later in the week when I get tired...tomorrow I start back on my good ol' long black coffees and I start measuring my cereal in the morning and being strict about my what I'm putting I'm eating and drinking...and I need to get that fourth exercise session happening!  It's a struggle and I know the exhaustion is linked to the amount of exercise and healthy food I'm having.  So all in all, I'm getting there slowly.  but I've got 106 days to get back on track and sorted in time for my amazing journey to becoming a personal trainer. 

My goal in being a personal trainer is to inspire and encourage others on their journey.  To beat the obstacles and bound over the hurdles and achieve things beyond their wildest dreams!! 

 I've been giving some thought to a name and I've considered Empower Personal Training! But there's quite a few businesses out there with that name.  I don't know whether they fully understand what it is to empower people though!  So back to the drawing board on that one.  I'm sure the right name will come at the right time! :-)

Anyway nearly time for bed!

 

monday

So Monday...busy day...so much happening at work...but i managed to sort out the problems that I faced at the end of last week and move forward from them.  Apparently though my view of the situation  was slightly different to the view of the other person's. But not to worry, I've set the precedent for the way forward and *fingers crossed* as we're moving in the next week or so, I'll hopefully not have to sit next to the person. Yahoo!  I'm so grateful that things turned out ok!

So what else happened...did a group class tonight...only four of us. My friend G was unwell which is not good...hopefully she's better next week.  I know she did enjoy it.  I'm hoping that once I get my qualifications I'll be in a position to run a few classes like this.  It will certainly help with cashflow, that's for sure...saving for my o'seas trip....going to Japan next March and then hopefully in late 2011 / early 2012 off to Europe and the UK for a little bit.

So now have had dinner and waiting for the washing to finish so i've got pants to wear to work and A's jacket is clean to wear to work.  So looking forward to sleep tonight as I've got a big day tomorrow.

Well the machine's just beeped...so it's bye from me for now!

Making a change

So I'm going on holidays for nine weeks from 13 September 2010.  Now this isn't just any holiday...I'm actually going to studying full time for eight of the nine weeks that i'll be off work.  I'm excited but at the same time a litte scared but I know this is the right thing to do.

I've lost in excess of 70 kg over the last few years and I want to give back some of what I've been given and one way I believe I can do this is to assist and guide people in becoming empowered to make a change in their life for the good! 

So 120 days to go...or approx 80 working days until that exciting new adventure begins :-)

a uhah moment!

So here I am again...at a cross roads...no sure where it will or will not lead... I've been dealing with some changes at work...although they may seem minor to most, I'm struggling with this! But on Friday I had somewhat of an uhah moment! I realised that in all of this I failed to hold the mirror up to myself ad examine my behaviour, my reactions, action and attitude.

So it's been a little scary doing this but i found that my compassion and respect has been lacking for some people in some situations.  This is not unfamiliar territory to me...I've been here before and made it through the other side. I realise I have little respect for the person or their position and this is what I struggle with.  I'm seeking support and advice and I've got some serious reading to do...I've found this is the best way to seek ways to approach this. I intend to do some things to increase my personal abilities in this area as i don't think this is the last time I have to deal with situations such as this.

So my goals I want to move forward with in a broad context:

• Demonstrate respect, compassion and patience to all people!
• Spend time being gracious for each and every thing every day!
• Spend more time expending energy and increasing endorphin and serotonin production, by regularly exercising!
• Finally spend time writing, reflecting and blogging!

Well that's it for now!

WOW!

WOW! that's the first words out of my mouth right now...I just read my last post and Wow...so much has happened...I met a wonderful loving guy...someone who feel absolutely head over heels for me...meanwhile I was rather cautious...stood back...and at first resistant to his advances. So we had already met when I'd sent my last post...we met in late January/early February and well at the end of March we made things official to our friends etc...So the next three months flew by spending some fantastic fabulous times with friends...even some mutual friends in fact...it was awesome and really beautiful...sadly though...last week we broke up...decided to end our relationship.

So our paths have parted and although I have remained a strong person initially, i'm finding things a little tough this past week...just getting used to the idea of continuing my journey without somebody by my side...but at the same time I'm joyous and happy that I've had that opportunity to spendtime with someone so fantastic fabulous and totally beautiful. WOW it's been good.

In my reflection though I've discovered that I've still much to learn about myself and how much I need to grow through life...learning about the things I will compromise on and the things that I absolutely won't compromise on as well as how i react to various situations and circumstances...

So here I am off on a new adventure, a new journey, a new beginning...where this road leads or what is around the corner I don't know but it will be fun and exciting, filled with lots of new experiences, new people and most of all many familiar friendly faces.

That's all for now...until next time